Swastamita

Aku ingin menyaksikan kau mati.
Tidak besok, tapi saat ini.

Tanpa nyanyian.
Tanpa wewangian.
Tanpa iring-iringan.

E.

Signing Out

Being a law student, I could say, was the best experience I've ever had. Woke up at 07.15 a.m. to attend a 07.15 a.m. class, did palaWAR to get the absolute-A-level classes (I once called this as the implementation of the jus ad bellum & jus in bello in real life), made laws or legal draftings or whatever you name it (I got B on Perancangan Undang-undang's Class, while others got C. So proud of myself). Never thought that the law school'd be this fun. Lol. Just kidding.

I once watched Legally Blonde (a very lawyerish thing) and found sth interesting—which was then called a hypothesis—& wrote that on my legal memo before the day one I ever stepped my feet @ faculty of law, i.e. "law school is for boring, and ugly, and serious person." After all the research I did, I finally found that the "law school is for boring, and ugly, and serious person" should be treated as void ab initio. I mean, Harvard probably is, but my campus??? ?? ???? My law school provides not only smart-ass living beings but also produces lots of good looking assholes oH My G00000d. I mean, have u ever seen a living thing at 07.15 a.m. in the morning with a commercial-hair-level? Wore a high quality fabric? In a pair of Gucci? They look so damn good like "yo dummies, I was born to be a top tier lawyer."

*In my case, wore the same yellow blouse for 3 consecutive days; paired with a literal-mom-jeans, a pair of classic oxford & a dark blue Jansport—to look like at least a proper law student—were classified as a lawyer-lookin-in action as well, ummmm, have u ever seen a humanitarian lawyer? They don't even have time to breathe.*

My responsibility as a law student has finally come to an end. By this writting, I am going to say goodbye to:

1. Gd. 1, Gd. 2, Gd. 3, Gd. 4, Gd. 5, Gd. 6, Gd. 7
2. Palawa
3. Kantin Fisipol
4. Fisipmol (a.k.a fisipmart)
5. Maskam
6. Bunderan
7. Perpustaakan pusat and its people (Bapak Sirkulasi, thank you so much for always give me loker paling bawah since you know I am smol and vulnerable).
8. Mas Rangga
9. Mas Rangga's tweets
10. Mas Rangga's Instagram
11. GSP
12. Taman Kearifan (and its bukit dua batu with literal-dua-batu which f-ugly and I hate it but at least you've tried your best and for that I give you A-).
13. Parkiran Foodpark, (one day I almost kesetrum but ngga jadi because Allah loves me too much it sometimes got me thinking why).
14. And other "inter alias" that I forget to mention one by one because my brain has its limit.

Thank you so very much y'all (esp. Fakultas Hukum),
Without whom I cannot be.
Viva, viva justicia!

Yogyakarta, April 28th 2019

Officially a LL.B.

Super Late

There's no specific reason behind this post. I just have to do something to prevent me dying prematurely. 

Since I don't hv much things to say (except I m1zz Ngapawali s000 much 1t hurts) I put lots of pictures for y'all to consume. Grab your chair, put your a$$ on it and/or die.

Much love,
me.

Kapal Motor Arung Samudera

Suminar's Letf Hand & Patrick

Bobo Cantik

Kontemplasi

Mencari Kutu 

Bocil Ngapawali

Bundadari

Kekasih Kuntai (also a fvccboi)

Kineng

mengajarkan ilmu hitam hehe ngga deng

memancing amarah

mencari perhatian warga desa

pura-pura bahagia agar panjang umur

pura-pura tidak tahu, padahal tahu

dalam rangka menghemat air di pondokan

Diplomatic Talks

No one asks but I am gonna say it anyway: "yes this was written using cellular" thats why the font et ceteras dont seem super neat and for that I am sorry.

Okay. Whatever.

The title might drive u to the wrong-ways. Let me explain.

The intention of me write this thoughtful post is not to voice my opinion(s) on  Indon and its international-more-political-relations, or India (which surprisingly) has Intercontinental Ballistic Missile(s) that never-been-used and its impact to Indonesia *if any, but i choose not to care bc my head hurts. I write this as a result of what-so-called broken. What's broken? My mind. And why is it diplomatic? Because *with the utmost respect towards me and y'all the readers as  human-persons* I restrain myself to put profanities in the most diplomatic way. Wow. U got it? Nah?

Ok.

I've been thinking about the idea of love and the art of falling for 5 months. Why is it me? Should I really have to feel and fall?The truth is, I've lost words. I have no logic-explanation whatsoever, but, I have a story. Before u start reading literally everything, I recommend you to play Crying over You by Honne on Spotify.

[Crying over You starts playing in the background]

I met someone, almost-a-complete stranger, at a coffee shop. [I dont even drink coffee, but...] I went to a coffee shop. If u guys think my story kinda looks like FTVs, then y'all better repent bc it wasnt like that. I met him by intention. I wanted it, vice versa *as a matter of fact, we both knew each other (for the very first time) from the internet. That's what: "by intention" mean.

I don't remember what we were discussing that time, but I do remember how I felt during the convos: safe. No more, no less.

(let's pretend I've told ya errthing)

Long story short, I knew something not right happened to my brain. It no longer worked properly: I couldn't think logically, got angry easily, and quite Djibouti. What was that strange thought(s)? Why I got super mad to a person just because he was breathing? What was the urgency of me phone-called someone so intense? Why I cried during a-should-be peace time? *cry intensifies*

How did the story end?

It ended with me falling. Was that love? I don't really think that was *sigh* it. I didn't want him to die. I wanted to have his problems. 

He was like a Mare Liberum to me: I caould freely sail on it, but have no right to proclaim. Not a good fact but okay. Along with that, I finally understood (partially, ok, genius takes time) about the concept of "peoples come & go." Xchillxx. I am now ready to get hurt again. Impressive. Are you even Me? *screams in logic*

Ok. Enough for today. I wish y'all a goodluck. Bye.

*the Author's note:

[To Whom it May Concern]

Oh, hi, it was you! Not Alexandra Ocasio (I even wrote her name incorrectly). Stay healthy. Keep alive. Thx for your weird yet ugly playlists. I hate 'em but of course I (still) listen to them 24 hours everyday. I xx you for the past time yesterday. Peace out.

Sincerely,

Me. 

Nyaris Sarjana

“sahabat itu kayak layangan, kalo semakin kita berisi semakin kita merunduk. Ingat, buah jatuh tidak jauh jatuh dari jauh jatuh dari pohonnya dan juga selalu ingat juga kata pepatah sedikit sedikit jadi bukit demi sedikit jadi bukit.”

-Anon

        Tulisan ini dibuat sebagai ekstensi dari “Terima Kasih Kepada” penulisan hukum gue. Selengkapnya silahkan buka ETD di lantai 2 Perpustakaan Pusat, lalu masukan nama lengkap gue buat kepo-kepo. Baiklah. 

            Pertama-tama, gue sangat berterima kasih kepada diri gue sendiri yang telah berjuang sampe napas tinggal separo untuk sampe ke tahap ini. Lo keren banget sih! Ok. Mantab. Lanjut, terima kasih juga kepada Jagat Saksana Dirga (istilah ini gue temukan di official site-nya gamaforce jadi silahkan googling sendiri artinya), yang tanpa mereka nih ya...gue hanyalah bocil yang tidak berdaya:

-    Ibunda, yang cintanya tanpa batas

-    Ayahanda, yang “iya iya” aja asal gue bahagia

-   Oppai Daikuchi—also congradz ko bodad yang taun ini akan jadi mahasiswi. Baru   kemaren keknya ditemuin di dalem kerdus mie sakura, eh udah mau kuliah aja.

Selanjutnya, gue ingin mengucapkan terima kasih kepada:

• Ikan Paus dan Mba Tika. Dua orang favorit gue sejak pertama ada di sini. Ngga terpisah. Ngga bisa dibagi. Kalian lumayan signifikan di dalam drama-drama per-kuliahan gue yang apaan banget. Berkat kalian gue makin positip mirip kuyang. Tolong baca “Terima Kasih Kepada” yang sesungguhnya di skripsi gue!
• Imam Besar Nawawi dan Kimz Turi q. Sobat perpus Penulis yang luar biasa. Membuat hidup Penulis lebih ada warnanya. Berkat gue, logat kalian jadi ke-Jakarta-Jakarta-an (beri aku uang sebagai upah). Kalian luar biasa. Semangat terus skripsiannya bosq. Mari kita jadikan khayalan buat buka bisnis Panti Jompo dengan konsep bangunan bergaya (?) industrial menjadi kenyataan;
• Mba Minul, yang tidak bosan gue php-in terus. Makasi nasi padangnya. Oia, tolong berhenti ajak gue makan kerang. Badan gue penuh timbal; 
• Rini Mamen, untuk dukungan dan semangat omong kosong yang leh ugha;
• Cindi yang nemenin gue belajar di kostan. Meski rasanya ngga berguna—bc gue juga ngga bisa jawab pas didadar tadi banget—tapi tetep makasi. Thai teanya juga makasy;
• Puma yang memberikan semangat-semangat basi di detik-detik menuju masuk ruang eksekusi. Makasi cerita tentang temen lu yang ditepu orang;
• Lita yang selalu ketawa terhadap apa yang gue katakan. Gue emang lucu. Untuk itu, terima kasih;
• Bosq Resya, yang jauh di mata dekat di hati. Makasi karena dedikasinya dalam mengajarkan gue bermain Tinder;
• Bapak Diyanku, karena nge-v-call gue buat ngobrol bareng bocil Ngapawali plus memberi gue susu ultra coklat;
• Bapak Willy, yang low-key romantis. Makasi bukunya. Semoga gue ngga jadi orang sesat;
• Bapak Bianka, karena memberi gue bunga warna ungu;
• Wandul, untuk NPM dan SSOnya;
• Majikanku Tercantik (dia nulis namanya sendiri begitu di kontak wassap gue), kerna mau mendengarkan kegalauan gue disela-sela nulis skripshay;
• Bosku Paling Cantik (sama kaya yang atas, dia nulis sendokir di kontak gue), kerna memberikan gue kucing lucu bernama She yang merupakan akronim dari She-lo-kan (alias selokan elah. comberan);
• Ban Trek, karena memberikan gue wejangan omong kosong yang mantab gan;
• Teman yang kutemukan tidak sengaja pada saat PLHK, Nindya. Gue tau sakitnya gigi lu   kea apaan gegara pake power-chain. Terima kasih chiki-chiki micinnya, gue pasti akan makan sampe gumoh;
• Clianta.d.s 12345678 yang mengatakan aku pintar;
• Mba Nit, karena memotivasiku agar tidak di persona-non-grata dari kampus;
• Warga bomenz yang responnya kentut banget pas tau gue sidang, yaitu Iting, Pitak, Nia, mari kita nge-bensu di Galaksi;
• Almamaterku. Makasi telah membuat gue gosong pas bikin formasi burung garuda (padahal kaga kiatan juga). UKT gue tolong gunakan dengan baik. Subhanallah, ya.
• Terakhir, genk KKN PPM STG-006. Kalian bikin gue nangis di kamar mandi, tapi tetep gue masukin di tulisan gue. Gapapa deh ya. Biar penuh.

           Selesai sudah tulisan gue. Semoga gue inget untuk menghapusnya di masa depan. Silakan baca Kata Pengantar penulisan hukum gue biar diabetes karena sweet abis. Di bawah ini gue lampirkan muka kalian sebagai tanda cinta (tentu saja bersama gue):

  

 Ganteng Ganteng Srigala (satunya UGM Cantik, tebak yang mana)

Bersama Sisa-sisa Masyarakat FH

Bidadari dan Jongos-jongosnya

 *Beberapa gambar mengandung muka gue yang bopung, but isokay, yang penting muka kalian sabi sabi. Salam super.

 Yogyakarta, 15 Maret 2019

E.

Perspektif: Dua

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